Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
