I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
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