I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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