So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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