My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Randomize
