No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
