No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
