what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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