I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Randomize
