Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i just had sex bonerless
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Randomize
