I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
i think my cat just said my name.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Randomize
