I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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