I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
