I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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