Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I need help removing her.
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
