Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
