it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
