What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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