I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
