Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
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