Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
