I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
