I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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