Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
