I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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