Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
