he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize