someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
