After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
