i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
