Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I cockslap morals
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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