for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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