Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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