I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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