I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
