She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
