if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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