Do you still have your period?
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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