PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Randomize
