Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
You pole danced in your parka.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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