you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
