I need help removing her.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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