i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
