what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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