we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
