Apparently you make a good broom.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
