Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
