Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
