yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
babies were throwing up all over the place
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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