its not stalking. its research.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
